Addiction /// 9:36 pm
Well.
My room is in a mess.
Because I am really slumming now.
My brain is fuzzed up with thoughts of you.
Its like being on eternal antidepressants.
Its my fault in the end, for expecting so much and nothing at all.
It's the Queen's birthday tomorrow.
But I
still need to go to school.
Sigh.
Another day of over-expectations, where I find myself hating my ever working mind.
I got a bar of peppermint soap from Pim today, and it smells nice!....
But I haven't used it yet, (smells too nice to be used :3)
I really need the school internet, the internet sucks here.
I am sick of food.
Funny eh?
I lost the appetite to eat Japanese, Italian, Chinese, Western, Indian, fast food.
All because it all seems so bland now.
Sigh.
I think tonight is another sleepless night, because I can't stand to dream of him again.
This is the first time that I have dreamt so much about someone else.
It makes life more excruciating, and sad.
And before someone tries to SPECULATE, I am not goth, nor emo.
I just like the colour black and I am sad because fate by the Lord has made me to worry more than laugh.
Breaking down seems so easy, but then I refuse myself to do that.
Its such an easy way out, instead of solving it out.
But how to rid myself of such a feeling?
“...I Wanna Be Loved
いつかは 未来
最後の奇跡の中で
光と闇に抱かれて
心の空に
かすかな夢を見つける...
...
窓の向こうには夜があるよ
輝くために
ずっと待っている
もういちど 灯り消せば
どこかに あの星...”
sigh.
Talking /// 7:42 pm
Well, while taking a lift from Jason in his car, I realised that I don't talk.
Why?
Five Reasons Why I don't talk to you:
5. I am sick.
4. I haven't talked the entire whole day, so my voice box is "rebooting".
3. I am enjoying the viewwwwww.... Shhh don't disturb.
2. I ABSOLUTELY DESPISE YOUUUUUU!!!!
1. I have NOTHING to say to you. :S
Well. Yeah.
:S
Respond /// 12:40 pm
Its midnight,
My heavy heart keeps
My eyes still open.
My lashes are laced with tears,
My eyes are stinging,
But it can't possibly compare
With the pain in my heart.
Why do my dreams come back and mock me?
You always smiled with me then
It always hurts in the reality
When you look in my eye and
Don't respond back.
The moon edges on
As I think about you.
My email's empty
In wait of your call.
This waiting is killing me
Deep inside I know nothing will come
And I still wait expectantly
For a respond.
Is it so hard for someone to love someone?
Is it so hard to just give up on feelings?
I know the answer,
But yet I choose not to believe it
Yet I still believe that one day
We will meet
And you'll invite me back
Like Nature's embrace
When you finally respond...
----------
Crap lousy song/poem/neither.
Chemin! Help! Change something!!!
Be with Me - Olivia閻韋伶 /// 12:25 am
你的香味早已經悄悄擄獲我的心 不需要言語就能說明
我的眼神開始在你身上悄悄遊移 瀰漫誘人的氣息 OH YA
BABY 現在只需要你邁開步往前進 對我說
YOU WANNA BE WITH ME
用心去體會每一秒鐘的喜悅 去品嚐愛的滋味
THAT I WANNA KNOW WOULD YOU WANNA BE WITH ME?
這是一首為愛寫下的歌曲 甜言蜜語 就在今夜 只為你
隨著旋律搖擺著你的身體 讓愛 覆蓋你
只想在今夜和你相擁一起 拋開 所有的流言蜚語
THAT I WANNA HEAR YOU SAY THAT YOU WANT ME
今夜的鎂光燈 全都只為你亮起 讓所有目光 矚目你
別去想明天 將會發生怎樣的事情 只要記得 我愛你
愛情它本來就是場遊戲 別再費盡心思去為它定義
THAT I WANNA HEAR YOU SAY YOU WANNA BE WITH ME
這是一首為愛寫下的歌曲 甜言蜜語 就在今夜 只為你
隨著旋律搖擺著你的身體 讓愛 覆蓋你
只想在今夜和你相擁一起 拋開 所有的流言蜚語
THAT I WANNA KNOW WOULD YOU WANNA BE WITH ME?
my fire is waiting for a new tune
and my glass is waiting for some fresh ice cubes
i 'm just sitting here waiting for you to come
come on home and turn me on
這是一首為愛寫下的歌曲 甜言蜜語 就在今夜 只為你
隨著旋律搖擺著你的身體 讓愛 覆蓋你
只想在今夜和你相擁一起 拋開 所有的流言蜚語
THAT I WANNA HEAR YOU SAY THAT YOU LOVE ME
THAT I WANNA KNOW WOULD YOU WANNA BE WITH ME?
~~~
forgotten rituals and persistent ills. /// 1:39 pm
ARGHH....
I just realised that I forgot my ritual of wishing on 20/08/2008 at 20:08.
Its funny, that I used to wish on that day every year ever since my teacher in pri. 6 told us about that.
I guess in the middle of the worrying and hectic tests I forgot to wish. ):
Well, its not like it ever works. --
Hahaha... OMG... While I was pinning my fringe back just now, I realised that a Widow's Peak was emerging!
Ewww.
And contrary to people's belief that the Widow's Peak makes someone prettier, I find it really ugly.
It doesnt appeal to my innate sense of symmetry!!! :S
I like the new upate to Winamp, it allows Chinese and Japanese words! Finally.
And now I am switching to Winamp, because I can get better streams for web radio on it.
Was searching the web for moles on lips. And I got this:
clickHahahaha!
Significance of shapes in Moles
Round - A round mole signifies the goodness in people.
Significance of Moles based on color
Light Colored Moles - Those who have light colored moles are considered lucky.
What Moles on your body parts means?
Arms
Moles on arms indicate that the person is polite, diligent and will lead a happy married life.
Noooooo.......... I dont want to get married!
Foot
People with a mole on foot are easy going and laid back. They need to exercise to stay healthy.
ummm.... guilty?
Knee A mole on left knee signifies that these people lead an extravagant lifestyle.
.... :S
Lips People with a mole on lips always aspire to get ahead in life.
i guess that must be true.
Hahahaha....welllll I am taking it with a pinch of salt. And perhaps pepper.
Its so freaking cold now, where's the sunnnnnn!!!!
~~ /// 9:31 pm
Its Saturday midnight
I woke up from a bad dream
to the sounds or silence
I could touch you in that dream
Although it felt so right
It was a nightmare
XC crap inspiration fizzled out.
---------------------------------------
I can't believe the god knows what's its name song that goes like "I kissed a girl and liked it" is right before "Kiss from a Rose". Its like a non-song to a song. Yes, I think the former is not a song. Thank goodness I don't even try to follow the english song market. *phew*
Anyway, I went on a tirade because I was pissed at nothing just now. I shall not say, but I especially bitching about someone to my mum. (: (XP)
MUAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
kk.
Well. That was some hollow laughter.
I might kill for amani's phone.
Why doesn't sony ericsson export these types of phones overseas???????? I really want one!!!
I would have bought this instead of my current sony ericsson one..... ):
): ): *sulks and
pouts*
Now, lets get me some japanese eye candy to see.
“。。。我们所知，头发是容易着火的。。。” /// 12:23 am
哈哈，eunice记得Pastor Sam所说的这一句话，听了十分很好笑。
（：
看了Code Blue的四节，觉得心里的心酸开始承受不了，只好停止。
Code Blue的内容十分感人，有时会难过得半天会沉入一个不好受心情，真受不了！
但是还是舍不得不知道藍澤的救急医生前途。真是自灭。）：
Code Blue与House M.D而相比，Code Blue的内容比较深刻。可能是House M.D实在有太多的季，节，把House的成就变成一个平凡的事。咳。。。
现在很努力地专心复习，但是电脑的吸引力实在太强了！
喔，之前说过了要写歌词，但现在还事没完成。ごめんなさい！我实在太懒了。
我大概有个概念歌词要写什么，但是要找正确的字来形容我真正的感受实在太难，英文还是有这么的缺点。
啊！Bic的打火机实在太难用。。。连基本的大火也那么难，怎么把蜡烛着火呢？
可能这是澳洲的劝人不要抽烟的方法，不会用打火机，就别想抽什么屁烟吧！嘻嘻。
蛮有用，连我都不想用蜡烛了。。。
分心的时间到了！该回去复习。
A post, after a lonesome and frustrating break /// 10:50 pm
Monday is the start of my non-teaching studying break. Finally, I have time to do things that I did not manage to do properly, including
studying, sleeping and brain training.
So, somethings that I learnt this week:
Fact: I switch off with something warm in my system.
Explanation: I don't know, I just realised that anything warm that I drink, be it a mocha or a hot chocolate, would lead me to nod at the lecturer at everything.
Fact: My bad habit of pissing people off with my tactless/sacarstic words are coming back.
Explanation: MM.... I have no idea too, why this is happening. ):
Fact: IT and co is in Perth this week today.
Thoughts: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I better not meet them on the streets. It will be C.A.M.E. (Civility, awkwardness, maddening, EXCRUCIATING). Fortunately they are leaving on Sunday, so I think I will not meet them in church. (I hope).
Fact: The only reason why some would like Bratz would be because they themselves are brats.
Explanation: Someone I know is. And who would like slutty girls in outfits that are way to mature for them? Theres a reason a 10 year old is a 10 year old and lets just keep it at that ok?
Fact: Hackett Hall hot chocolate is the BESTTTT!!!!
Explanation: It speaks for itself.
Fact: Its Pim's birthday tomorrow!
Thought: Hurrah!
Fact: Siwon is frustrated.
Explanation: Check out her blog.
Fact: There are more gay people everyday.
Explanation: You should understand it yourself.
Love You I Do /// 5:19 pm
I have this feeling of deja vu that I have posted it up before, but then I shall post it again.
Love You I Do - Jennifer Hudson
Never met a man
Quite like you
Doing all you can
Making my dreams come true
You’re strong and you’re smart
You’ve taking my heart
And I’ll give you the rest of me too
You’re the perfect man for me
I love you I do
Mm I love ya
I’ve never felt
Quite like this
Good about myself
From my very first kiss
I’m here when you call
You’ve got it all
And confidence like I never knew
You’re the perfect man for me
I love you I do
You’ve got a charm
You simply disarm me every time
As long as u drive
I’m along for the ride
Your the way
I said it before
There won't be a door
That’s closed to us
Putting all my trust in you
Cause you, you’ll always be true, Oh
I never could have known
This would be,
Oh you and you alone, yeah
Now for me
I know you’re the best
You’ve passed every test
It's almost too good to be true
You’re the perfect man for me
I love you I do
You’re the perfect man for me
I love you I do
(:
Well, I have been meaning to post in the blog, but with the recent state of events : ANHB1102 in class essay on thurs, internet outage!!!
lovesickness and so on, I couldn't blog.
I have been working on a poem too, so I didn't feel like posting anything until I finished it. But then I got lazy. Yes I am lazy
(really really really).
Well. I really love the candlelight version of すき by Crystal Kay and Sowelu on youtube, but then I can't get it as a sound format!!! ): Sowelu sounds ok in this song, but if you hear both of them sing When You Believe in the same tv show, you think that Sowelu sung marvellously. Sowelu was practically trying to outsing Crystal Kay (IMPOSSIBLE) and shouted during the song :S.
Lesson learnt: Don't try to outsing someone who can carry off a Whitney Houston song by herself.
So, we have Charlie Bond for CHEM1102, and it was so boring that I fell asleep right in the middle on enantiomers. ): And then when I sort of was in my half-asleep-awake stage, I stared at Vinh for about ten seconds, before I waved to him. During the staring moments, I was like, " ..... Do I know this guy ( He was wearing specs then).... I think I do..... sooo... hes looking at me.... like he recognises me.... so what do I do now?... Oh YEAH! WAVE!...." And my hand followed suit in 1 sec. == I was really so tired.
But after that lengthy and retarded long period of thinking, my brain went back to working mode and then I started drawing a bed with eyes and a mouth saying "I miss you!!!" I should get married to my bed.
What I want to achieve by the age of 30 (follow up from CM) /// 10:18 pm
I saw that chemin has decided to write that this list, so I am going to follow suit.
Age 30 the prime of life, I will be:
1. A doctor in Pathology(any biology related field)?Yeah, I know, predictable. <_<>
2. Rightful owner of a US$150k per year pay cheque.
Woah so much money3. Owner of a BMW convertible.
Scratch Lamborghini, BMW's are much nicer shaped. Also because BMWs look more comfortable.
4. Get an assistant professorship in another country.(Japan *hint hint*) Why go into the working society when you can continue learning endlessly at the university? (And get discounts off electronic stuff at staff rates?)
5. Travelled to Alaska and Antarctica.
And also possibly observe penguins for half a year? I don't know, but then observe the life forms in the land.
6. Get a patent for one of my work.Yeah. MONEY MONEY MONEY. One day maybe I am going to patent one length of your genetic code.... >|D hahahahaha and then I will be rich! Then people would have to pay meee.... Well, if you think that is impossible, some company is trying that now. But at least a protein code?
7. Own pieces of land. Yeah, dabble in the real estate market, and then get rich from en blocs. Then later on buy prime estate and then retire with a stable income with the uber high rent.
8. Build my dream houseYeah, I want my house in ... San Jose? Or Colorado, wherever Aunt Fran was in. I absolutely want to have deer coming into my property. Then on that piece of land, I want the house to built within a 10 m boundary into the land. The house is to be made of glass walls on the exterior which I can observe the night sky or the waking sky. The garden would be filled with lavender and poplar trees so that the house would not be seen from the outside. ( I know, so hermit like right?) And of course a garage. And a driveway.
... in all, it just needs alot of money.
9. Travel the world. Understood.
10. Be self-fufilled. Be satisfied with what I have done during those 30 years. And be happy.
